How-to
How to add a death date to an existing headstone
A step-by-step guide for families adding the final date to a stone that is already in the cemetery: who to call, the cemetery’s permission, matching the lettering, on-site or in-shop, and how long it takes.
· 10 min read · By Monumize Editorial Team
Before you start
Many couples buy a shared headstone while both are living, or after the first death, with both names and only one set of dates complete. When the second person dies, the family asks a monument shop to add the final date: the date of death, and sometimes a year or a short line. The trade calls this a final date or death date inscription. It is one of the most common jobs a monument shop does, and the first time a family arranges it, the process can feel unclear.
Three parties are involved. You (or whoever holds the burial rights), the monument dealer who cuts the date, and the cemetery that has to allow the work. The dealer usually coordinates with the cemetery, so in practice most families deal with one person.
The stone usually stays where it is. Portable sandblasting equipment lets a dealer cut the new date at the grave. Taking the stone back to the shop is the exception, not the rule.
There is rarely a deadline. Many families wait until after the funeral and the first weeks have passed. If the cemetery or the season means a wait, the date can be added later without any harm to the stone.
The 7 steps
1. Call the monument dealer, ideally the one who made the stone
Adding a date to a stone already in the cemetery is ordinary work for a monument dealer (also called a monument company or memorial shop). The shop that made the original stone is the best first call: it may still have the layout and know the lettering it used. If it has closed or is far away, ask the cemetery office which shops regularly work there.
2. Gather what the shop will ask for
The name exactly as it appears on the stone, the date or dates to add, the cemetery’s name and town, and the section, lot or plot number if you have it (it is often on the burial-rights deed or the cemetery’s paperwork). A straight-on phone photo of the whole face of the stone helps the shop see the lettering, spacing and free space before anyone visits.
3. Get the cemetery’s permission
Most cemeteries need written permission before an installed stone is altered, usually signed by whoever holds the burial rights. Some approve the wording, some charge a fee, and some only allow work on certain days or seasons. Your dealer normally submits the request and knows the cemetery’s rules; you may just need to sign.
4. Agree the wording and the format
The new date should follow the one already there. If the birth date reads “MARCH 3, 1942”, the final date is usually written the same way, with the same abbreviations, punctuation and dash. If only years are shown, add only the year. This is also the time to decide whether anything else is added, such as a second name or a short line.
5. Ask how the shop will match the lettering
The new numbers should match the style, height, spacing and depth of the old ones, and sit on the same line. Shops match from the stone itself: a rubbing, a tracing, measurements, or a photo taken square to the face and scaled to the stone’s real size. Many shops then cut a rubber stencil from a computer file and sandblast through it.
6. Approve the proof
Before cutting, the shop should show you a proof: the new date drawn in place, ideally on a photo of your stone. Read every digit and letter, check the spelling of the month, and compare the style with the existing date. Once a date is cut it cannot simply be erased, so this is the moment to catch mistakes.
7. The date is cut, and you check the finished stone
Most final dates are sandblasted on site: the shop masks the stone, applies the stencil and blasts the new date in place. Some jobs are done in the shop instead. When the work is done, visit or ask the shop for a photo, and keep the approved proof and invoice with your family records.
Not sure what the lettering on your stone is called? Our guide to headstone lettering styles shows how to tell Roman, modified Roman, block and script lettering apart, which helps when you talk to the shop.
On site or in the shop
| On site | In the shop | |
|---|---|---|
| Where the cutting happens | At the grave, with portable sandblasting equipment | At the monument shop, after the stone is taken up |
| When it’s used | Most final dates on upright and flat granite stones | When the cemetery, the stone, the material or the extent of the new work calls for it |
| What to expect | The stone stays put; the work depends on dry weather above freezing | More handling and usually a longer wait; the cemetery may need to approve removal and resetting |
Your dealer will recommend one based on the stone and the cemetery’s rules. Read more in our guide to on-site headstone engraving.
How long it takes
The cutting is the quick part. The wait comes from everything around it:
- First call and quote. Quick, once the shop has the photo and the cemetery details.
- Cemetery permission. Depends on the cemetery: some answer within days, others meet on a schedule.
- Proof and approval. Mostly in your hands. Read it carefully rather than quickly.
- Waiting for a slot. Usually the longest part. Shops group cemetery visits, and spring is their busiest season.
- Weather. Sandblasting needs dry conditions above freezing, so winter requests often wait for spring.
- Cutting. The shortest step: the date itself is cut in a single visit.
Ask the shop for its current lead time when you first call, and mention any date that matters to the family, such as an anniversary or a family gathering. See also how long a second date takes.
What it costs
Prices vary with the shop, the stone, how many characters are added, the cemetery’s fee and how far the shop has to travel, so ask for a written quote that lists everything. Our cost guide explains what moves the price, and the cost calculator gives a rough range to plan with.
Common pitfalls
A wrong digit on the proof
The costliest mistake is approving a proof with a wrong date or a misspelled month. Check it against the death certificate or funeral home paperwork, and ask a second family member to read it too.
Lettering that doesn’t match
Older stones were often cut in a style the shop no longer uses, or lettered by hand. The aim is the closest match in style, height and spacing. Ask to see the new date drawn on a photo of your actual stone, next to the existing date, before you approve it.
Waiting on the cemetery
Work can stall because the cemetery hasn’t received the signed authorization. Ask the dealer early what the cemetery needs from you, and send it promptly. Our guide to cemetery rules for inscriptions covers the usual requirements.
Ask your monument dealer about Monumize
Monumize is software for monument shops, not a service families order from. A shop photographs the stone with a phone and enters its size. Monumize straightens the photo to scale, reads the dates already cut, and suggests the closest matching lettering style from its catalog of open-licensed monument fonts. The shop places the new date on the photo, so you can see it in place, and downloads to-scale cut files for its stencil cutter. The shop still cuts and sandblasts the stone as usual.
If matching the old lettering worries you, or you’d like to see the new date on a photo of the stone before approving it, it’s fair to ask your dealer how they match lettering and whether they’d try Monumize. The first job is free for shops. You can see the whole process in our 78-second walkthrough.
Planning the wording? Try the free inscription text builder and font preview, then take the result to your shop.
Free for families
Need a final date added? We can try to connect you with a monument shop
Tell us where the stone is and how to reach you. We’ll look for a monument shop that works at that cemetery and, if we find one, pass on your details with your permission so the shop can contact you with a quote. We’re still building our network of shops, so we can’t promise one in every area yet. We don’t engrave stones ourselves and we don’t charge families for this.
Frequently asked questions
Ready to start?
Monument shops: photograph the stone, match its lettering and download to-scale cut files for the final date. Your first job is free.